My life is an endless circle of chaos. That's the exact word Isaac said last night to me. He told me that I am chaos. I didn't realize it until just now how much that hurt me. I have stayed up well past the time I should have been asleep to talk with him on the phone. Not only that but he wakes me up every morning by calling me. I love him, I really really do but ... I can't go on like this. I can't be awake as long as he is. I ... I don't want to compare because it's not fair, he & I are two very different people. I just ... I wish that he were easier to love. I miss you so very much. Send me guidance please.
Love,
Me.
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